Even though it’s no longer 2020, sadly COVID isn’t over. We may be heading in and out of lockdown for a while and we all need Ideas for surviving lockdown with kids.
If you’re thinking “how will I survive another quarantine with kids?”; this is what we learned from our second time staying home with the family:
The biggest lesson I learned is Come up with a PLAN to deal with the family in lockdown. Even a messy smorgasbord of ideas is better than nothing. It doesn’t need to be a strict schedule, in fact it’s better if it isn’t. But having a bunch of activities to choose from when you need a quick distraction will save your mental health.
Disclaimer; I’m not a doctor or medical professional. The words in this post are only my thoughts and opinions and if you choose to act on any suggestions those are your own decisions and responsibility.
What does a New Zealander know about Sheltering In Place !?!
Okay, okay, I hear you. I am well aware how super privileged I am to live within the safety of NZ borders right now. We don’t currently have COVID widespread in the community, so what could I possibly know from this side of the world about what other people are suffering through?
Answer: I don’t know what it’s like. I’m not assuming that I do. My aim is to help and share what I learned from our (relatively less) stressful experience. And to express how deeply I feel for parents – I can still understand the devastating impacts a prolonged lockdown can have on sanity, relationships, income and career.
Here in Auckland, New Zealand, we’ve been quarantined at home with the kids four times now. When Lockdown 2 started I thought we’d continue from the fairly happy place that Lockdown 1 ended: sunny days, drifting from one activity to the next, reading books, lots of cuddles, and outside play.
The first trap I fell into was thinking:
Oh, we’ve done this before, it’ll be fine.
Hilarious! How many times do you think you can hear your child complain “I’m Bored. Mum, I’m BORRRRRRRED!” before you crack?
I don’t want you to find out.
I’m not about to debate whether Lockdowns are the answer to beating this virus or not. However, if your government has mandated one or it’s self-imposed, below you’ll find my Ideas for surviving lockdown with kids. And what I’ll be coming back to if we have to do it again.
Why it’s so important to prioritise your self-care when stuck at home with kids
It’s gotta be a situation where you put YOUR oxygen mask on first. Maybe you have to hold down a job while dealing with bored kids, somehow furthering their education too. Maybe you have to keep them occupied while your partner works.
Whatever is on your plate, it’s going to feel like juggling chainsaws. You can’t be expected to manage in a constant frazzled and disconnected state. For weeks on end.
Now is the time to sit down and ask yourself:
How will I take care of my mental health if I’m going back into lockdown with my family?
Whatever you do, don’t under-estimate how hard and relentless each tantrum and boredom meltdown can get. Like I did. They will wear you down. Your children are so tuned into you, they will pick up on that energy, even before you realise it’s what you’re feeling yourself.
Related post: Top parenting strategies that keep me sane and my kids happy
Recognising what triggers you and what you can do when you feel yourself getting wound up is a good first step. Acknowledging feelings can take the wind out of a bad reaction’s sails. You will have those moments. And they will pass.
What I did that gave me a chance to tune into myself and help keep me calm(ish):
- Daily exercise for me is key for mental calm. Preferably in the morning. I walk 20 mins around the block, or do a short yoga practice while the kids watch some TV and my husband gets breakfast ready.
- If I get to walk I make sure I listening to some music – NOT the news.
- This will be my check-in time;
- How did yesterday go?
- What can I do better today?
- Did anything work well?
- Are there any known tough transitions or hurdles today?
- Listen to books! WHILE doing the dishes, making dinner, setting up for the next day. I use Libby because it’s free through my library. It’s available around the world, but if you can’t access the book you want Audible is also good. Before listening to books like this, I had only read maybe 3 books in the 6 years of being a parent! Now, well, I’m up to 4 books in the last 6 weeks, cos I can multi-task!
- Track my phone usage and making sure I stick to my phone protocols:
- Only use the camera to capture a memorable moment, or urgent message for help.
- If I’m looking up some information to tell the kids what I’m using the phone for, such as Googling the capital of Laos (it’s Vientiane)
- No mindless scrolling or searching for the latest news. This one is hard because the very reason we’re in quarantine is an ever-developing news story and I want to stay up to date. It’s easy to justify that this is important. But, I have to stop and really ask myself “Is knowing right this second how many new COVID cases recorded going to make my day with the children easier?”
- Paying myself compliments. I came out of the first lockdown feeling so down about my parenting, self esteem, and my body. I’m not going to let that happen again. The reality is that this will be intense and I may lose my cool or not have my best moments but I’m going to choose to focus on and celebrate the GREAT moments. And so what if I gain some pounds? They will be from baking cakes and cookies and enjoying them with my two little cherubs. I’m certainly not about to model bad body self esteem issues for my daughters!
- Daily Tidy-up time in the afternoon WITH the kids. The first couple of days into lockdown I had gotten myself so wound up due to the mess and chaos. I imagined weeks of spending hours a night tidying up, preparing for the next day. So we introduced 10 mins Tidy Up Time before they had some afternoon tv. Every day. In the past I had given up on enforcing tidying after 10 minutes of whinging or negotiating. Not this time. This is how it worked:
- Put some energetic music on, or find a tidy up song (If you can bare it on repeat)
- We all tidy for 10 minutes together – usually offering suggestions like “put that toy away in that tub”, to get them started
- If they don’t pitch in they have 5 minutes taken off their tv time as a consequence. But use this threat sparingly.
- It didn’t matter if they weren’t particularly effective in their efforts, because with 4 of us focussed on picking things up meant most of the chaos was under control again BEFORE the kids were in bed. This chilled me out significantly, because I knew it would be dealt with later. And not alone.
Establish Lockdown Schedule and Rules for the house
Even if you’re not a fan of too much structure, a rough schedule to run your day by will help everyone in the household be on the same page.
Below is the rough schedule we followed. Okay not so rough, but it gave us a rhythm to follow. And we quite often abandoned the plan, but it was something to set us up and come back to when the internal chaos and screaming was overwhelming.
| Time | Activity | Suggestions |
|---|---|---|
| 6 – 8am | BREAKFAST | Ease into the day, take advantage of not having to rush out the door. Read books, draw, do lego, listen to storybooks |
| 8 – 8.30am | TV for kids / Yoga for parents | I use FitOn (free version), because there are classes that are just 25 mins. |
| 8 – 10am | Playtime / Outside time | Family walk round the block Ride bikes Nature treasure hunt Water play outside |
| 10 – 10.30am | MORNING SNACK | |
| 10.30am – 12pm | Playtime | Indoor quiet activities Screen time or school work Outside activities Self occupied play so parent can work |
| 12 – 1pm | LUNCH | Pack a picnic and find a tree on your walk to sit under – if allowed. |
| 1 – 2.30pm | Crafts or projects | Tactile activity, like playdoh, rainbow rice, water-play, paint, wood work, baking |
| 2.30 – 3pm | AFTERNOON SNACK | |
| 3 – 4pm | Playtime | Indoor quiet activities Screen time or school work Outside activities Self occupied play so parent can work Family walk round the block |
| 4 – 4.15pm | TIDY UP TIME | Help smaller children tune into specific tasks so they don’t get overwhelmed; Pick up soft toys Tidy away the books unload dishwasher sort and fold clean laundry collect all dirty laundry and turn washer on |
| 4.15 – 5pm | TV for kids / Make dinner for parents | Occasionally get the children involved so you don’t feel like a complete slave |
| 5pm | DINNER | |
| 5.30 – 6.30pm | Playtime | Good time to get some physical activity in to tire them out before bed |
| 7pm | Bedtime for kids | Bath-time Stories & Reflect on the day Chat |
| 10pm | *Bedtime for adults | This one is for *me. Go to bed when you like. I just know I’m better if I make myself go to bed early. I don’t care if you think I’m a nana. It’s a marathon and I have to pace myself. |
Refresh House Rules at the start of Lockdown to bring focus to appropriate behaviour
These are extraordinary times and an extra dose of kindness and understanding can go a long way. Establishing or resetting some ground rules for how things work when we can’t always blow off steam or escape the intensity, can bring focus to what behaviour is expected.
Of course some house rules are the same as usual, but it never hurts to go over them.
| No hurting; kicking, hitting, biting, scratching, hair-pulling |
| Give each other some space to calm down |
| Slow down and listen to each other |
| Respect each other and people’s things |
| Choose Kindness |
| Wash hands thoroughly and often |
Are your bosses expectations of what you’ll achieve in Lockdown with kids realistic? (sorry, bit of a rant)
If you’re a working parent at home with the kids, you’re in a tough spot. On one hand you’re grateful you still have a job and are able to do it at home. However, you have to do it at home WITH YOUR KIDS.
You’re juggling the stress of performing well at your job and the fear of losing the job if you don’t perform well, on top of dealing with bored, anxiety-ridden kids.
Coronavirus exposed the reality of what life is like for working parents. Especially for mothers, who are carrying most of the childcare load during pandemic restrictions and lockdowns.
There are plenty of bosses who are adjusting their expectations on parent-employees’ workloads. But there are plenty of work places who are NOT understanding the extraordinary situation working parents find themselves in. This blogger writes about her experience with her boss’s unrealistic demands.
I’m hoping for your sakes that you’re not unlucky enough to be in that position. And I also hope that this will lead to a greater discussion on the long term impacts and added stress for employees with young families.
Danisa Malina-Derben, from School for Mothers surveyed 286 UK mothers in 2020 and produced a Special Report on Mothers & Covid 19. This goes deep into the impacts of lockdown and why we need to raise the volume on support for working parents.
These parents are raising the next generation of humans who will pay taxes and be there to look after us when we’re too old to lift a spoon to our mouths.
Lay it on the table for your managers. It doesn’t matter how many blogs you read that give you Ideas for surviving lockdown with kids. This is going to be a juggle. If all parents highlight these challenges to their employers, it makes it harder to discriminate against an individual.
Okay, Rant over. On to useful ideas to occupy time in lockdown….
Ideas for tech-based activities to survive lockdown boredom
- Get the family moving with an online dance class. I’ve tested all of the below out on my 4yr old and 6yr daughters.
- Set up with friends a video chat or Zoom play-dates or project dates
- Tired of reading books to your kids, or didn’t manage to get to the library before they closed? Story Online has recordings of well known actors reading books. There’s also the NASA channel Story Time From Space with astronauts reading to kids FROM SPACE!!!. Kate Rubins reading Rosie Revere, Engineer is our favorite.
- Nature Cams
- Explore.org
- Pandas & Bears
- Oceans, Fish & Sharks
- Space (You can watch this too if you’re needing some visual awe and perspective)
- Go on a Virtual Field Trip – this article has links to 40 virtual tours and learning experiences to boost kids’ learning.
- Podcasts for kids
- Brains On! Science Podcast for kids – this one discusses with kids how to perceive time during the pandemic and how strange it feels.
- Good Night Stories for Rebel Girls – A modern fairy tale podcast for kids about extraordinary women from all over the world
- Story Quest – Stories for Kids – Original stories for kids and families, suitable for all ages.
- Kid Stories – An exciting collection of original stories crafted for a younger audience
- Do Science projects with Nanogirl (AKA Dr Michelle Dickinson)
- Teach kids to Code with these free or low cost online coding program resources
Indoor games to play with the kids while sheltering in place
Indoor games to play WITH the kids (No tech, no gadgets, just you and your little humans). Why not FEAST on the quality time?
| I Spy With My little Eye | Great for developing observation, letter recognition, and conversation. If you have younger kids you can suggest by colour rather than letter. We play this at the dinner table to help keep the 4 year old engaged and not running off. |
| Mirror body movement and shapes | Take turns copying body movement and shapes. Including funny faces always results in the giggles. |
| Hide and seek | If you have an under 5 year old I recommend trying this trick. Place a pair of shoes poking out from under some curtains or a blanket as a decoy. The scream of joy and frustration is priceless. |
| Warmer / Colder | Hide a toy and guide the other person to where it is by letting them know if they are Warmer (closer) or moving Colder (away) |
| Snails Stuck in the mud | Snails so that it’s a safe speed to play inside. You need at least 3 bodies to play this. |
| The Floor is Lava | Gather all the cushions and make a challenging path around the room and don’t touch the floor. Otherwise you fall to your doom and burn in the molten lava that randomly just appeared in your lounge. |
| Sock Basketball | Roll up a few pairs of socks into balls and (so they are soft) and see if you can get them into the basket. Excellent for hand eye coordination |
| Indoor scavenger hunt | Write up a checklist with tick boxes of about 5 or 6 things that you have around the house. Hand one each to your kids and send them off to find each item. I use this to give me 5 minutes to pack an outing bag or get myself ready. |
| Indoor obstacle course | Use masking tape to create arrows of an interesting pathway under tables, through chair legs and back and forth across the room. Time each child as they complete the course. |
| Make a play | Dress up as characters and name them. Help your child decide on a main goal or dream their character wants to achieve in life (like climb a mountain) Define a hurdle or why it’s hard to achieve that dream, (for example; They are scared of heights). Act out the story of how this character will overcome this hurdle and achieve their dream. Let your kids lead on the decisions as much as possible. It’s all imaginary so no one will get hurt. |
| 20 Questions | One person thinks of an object or a famous person, and another person has 20 questions to guess what or who it is! Great to play in teams, especially to help little ones think of the questions and what it might be. |
Related Post: 7 Secrets to Baking with kids
Outdoor ideas for surviving lockdown with kids
The mental marathon of surviving lockdown with kids will be a whole lot easier if you spend time outside Every. Single. Day.
It’s important not just for your kids, but for you too. The benefits of spending time outdoors are well documented and numerous. I would argue it’s The best coping tool for lockdown; Fresh air, Perspective; Vitamin D from the sun; Sunlight for sleep regulation; the Best place to exercise, and to hear birds, because there aren’t many cars zooming around.
And moving your body from inside to outside is FREE. If you are lucky enough to have some outdoor space to run around in here’s some ideas:
- Running games like tag, stuck in the mud, pool noodle whack, dance offs, obstacle course races, hopscotch.
- Chalk or sidewalk paint – Check out Jordan Page’s super simple recipe.
- Rain dances or puddle walks. If it’s wet outside, embrace the weather, pull on gumboots and raincoat and go hunt for the biggest puddle to jump in. Oh, the kids will love it too. And you will really appreciate being back in your warm dry house after a refreshing adventure.
- Outdoor scavenger hunt: Make a checklist of 6 things they have to find and tick off on your daily walk, such as 1 x White Flower, 1 x tall tree, 1 x blue house.
- Water play: Run through a sprinkler, build a water channel with any tube like shape, fill a wide container or bucket and a pile of floatable and non-floatable objects for your kids to explore buoyancy. Add soap bubbles.
- Stage your own version of the Olympics. Make a bunch of medals, a podium, and nonsensical sporting events in which the kids win MOST of them
- Picnics – Packing for one is an activity itself in our house. Then eat the food outside or as close to outside as you can under your restrictions. This may be a tree in a park, on your block, or your garden or balcony, or an open window if you can’t get outside. Food tastes better outside.
- Gardening – plant some seeds at the start of lockdown. Watering and checking on how much their plant has grown each day over lockdown was an effective and quick distraction for us when things were getting desperate. It was like a happy switch sometimes.
Safety outside of the home during lockdown
I think in society’s relief and desperation to get back to ‘normal’ once initial lockdowns were over, we’ve been very good at reverting back to complacency and not dealing with being prepared.
Take us Kiwi’s in New Zealand. Our country has at least 500 active fault lines of which any could rupture at any time. And yet, only an estimated 18% of households have made preparations for a significant natural disaster.
COVID is no different. It’s hard to take a threat seriously when you can’t see it. Being prepared when you leave your home will minimise the virus’s chance of making you (and your family) it’s new host.
Please take precautions, wash your hands and stay safe, be kind. We will get through this together.
